Dennis Cheok
06/03/1989
Singapore Polytechnic - Information Communication Techonology (DICT)
City Harvest Church - N384 (AN Zone)
godfreak@gmail.com
Fav. Food: Beef Noodles
Fav. Drink: Bandung
Fav. Person: Jesus
Fav. Song: Majesty(Here I Am)[Delirious?]
Fav. Singers: BoA & Jay Chou
Fav. Bands: Fort Minor, Linkin Park & Delirious?
Dennis can Dance!
Dennis can Sing!
Dennis can Compose Songs!
Dennis can Speak Well!
Dennis is an Animal Lover!
Dennis Loves God!
What more do you expect man ? X)
Key.Of.Heart
..Growth & Multiplication
..Smooth Graduation in SP
..Enter SOT
..Quick Enlistment and Quick ORD..
gosh... things had been going so bad that i dun even know who i am.. i mean.. like people around me.. i mean like really close ones, juz seem to shut the door.. and it seems like the past experiences juz start all over again.. this world is definitely so unfair.. how often are you give the opportunities to get angry ? well.. definitely not for me.. i'm probably deprived of anger.. and i've noticed that recently, i'm starting to lose my patience on certain issues.. and its really quite hard to vent it out.. cause there's no open doors.. try picturing a scene where it was snowing at night, and your mum shut the door and leave you outside of the house.. that's how it feels like.. and all you have is juz a torn and tattered blanket and a lamp at hand.. and you have to survive the night by yourself.. make the wrong move and you're dead.. ya.. that kinda feeling.. hmmm.. i dunno why, i juz got that picture in my head.. hmmm.. ya lohz.. its always the same thing.. you always feel like there's a hope somewhere lingering in the air ? and you always want to have what we call a miracle.. ya ya.. miracle do exist.. but when you want it, it dun happen, and when you least expect it, a miracle happens.. i just want to have a comfortable life that doesn't let me worry about anything that cracks my head around.. but a headache always come by when you always give me so many stuff which i have to make a decision whether i want to stay on the path with you, or whether i want to take my own path.. cause i wanna walk your path.. but your paths has got tributaries.. and you always make me guess which path you are going to take.. and whenever i make the wrong path, i regret.. cause it wasn't the path that you chose.. and i have to walk this lonely path alone and hope to meet you again at a link.. but i was juz wondering, wad if the path you had chosen could never end up in a link that we could meet.. and that means that whatever i had sow in you had all gone down the drain.. and i definitely do not like the feeling of it.. cause i never liked wasting so much time and effort in it, and all i know, it juz didn't tingle anything.. that means whatever i'm doing is dead, and i know that its gonna cause quite a big hole in me.. its really true.. you call me, only to get certain information and give assignments.. no further than that.. and its really quite crappy to know that you dun even sense anything wrong with it.. its like you live your own life and i live my own life.. and ya.. that shouldn't be the way.. you juz gotta know that sometimes whatever i'm doing, it had been considered carefully before making that decision.. but sometimes you juz dun seem to get it, and you always react like nothing happened and it really quite saddens me.. you juz come and go.. i do like your company, but den.. this has to stop.. i've been going through this over and over again.. its like never ending.. and now i have to make another decision, whether to cut the line and let you flow in your own river, or to continue to face this humiliation.. but ya.. i oso do understand that i only see things form my own point of view.. maybe you're facing some things in life too.. and i juz dun get you, and you juz dun get me.. and that's THAT.. quite frustrated about it, cause its not the first time.. it is happening simultaneously.. and its quite irritating to a certain extent.. but maybe its oso about my expectations.. cause i always have visions of wad's going to happen next, but instead, it always happens the opposite.. and that kind of feeling juz totally feel so screwed up.. you know, like how you always screw up in big and major events, and break the vibe that everyone is feeling.. that's how i'm feeling.. Ahhh.. juz so irritating.. cause i juz dun want to fall into the same trap again.. that kind of pain is unbearable.. and it always take time to heal.. and time would be wasted.. I just thought of this idea.. why am i always walking in someone else's tributaries ? and not someone trying to walk in my lane ? why arz ? Life is just so ironic and contradicting.. that even your closest friend walk out on you and you juz suddenly feel so cold about the situation.. and you always have to take comfort all by yourself.. I always walk my life in Faith.. juz hoping to find something that could give Love.. and that's where i had the aconyms FHL.. Faith, Hope, Love.. I always have to run back to that one person and asked him to place me back on my own path.. and its really like a cycle over and over again where i step into someone else's path and thing dun turn out well, and i have to start from scratch, Point A.. it is never ending.. and its so sickening.. Why is it always so hard to comprehend ? its always when one point of your life turns out well, the other part of your life juz got screwed up.. another example which popped into my mind.. its like you juz got a promotion at work.. and when you reach home, your parents are quarreling, even mentioning about a divorce.. ya.. that's the kind of feeling man.. and its really quite irritating.. and you are like thinking when will this ever stop ? Because there are juz so many things that i have to worry about and sometimes, some problems are not even supposed to be solved by me ? why does everyone always throw everything to me.. i need a break somehow or another.. i juz feel like moving out of house, and juz be alone, cut out from all my communication and juz ya.. be alone, and live a peaceful life for a while, and not be bothered so much about relationships, family, finance and stuff.. gosh.. its quite irritating. . why can't there be someone by my side and help me out, you always think that you're helping me out, but you're not.. you're juz not wise enough.. and i juz feel that you're definitely not in my league.. but..
The Feeling Of Losing It Away Seem So Unbearable.. But The Chance Of Holding On Seems So Slim.. And All I Can Do Is To Watch You Go By..
Maybe i should be like you.. someone with less words and more focus in the things that you do.. and you do seem to be quite strict.. and maybe i should be a person like that too.. hmmm.. juz wondering.. :__)
